Thus I Wrote

When you parted from me
I felt uneasy
Incomprehensibly
I felt uneasy

We’d connected tentatively
Then more deeply
All too briefly
More deeply

We rode wildly,
We fell differently
You and me
Differently

Have you taken from me?
All you needed from me?
Unquestionably
All you needed from me?

What do you think when you see?
Your memories?
Playing timelessly?
In your memories?

We’re moving on freely,
Moving on differently
You and me
Differently

Since you parted from me,
I’ve felt uneasy
Instinctively
I’ve felt uneasy

Driving through a blizzard of snow
A blizzard of snow
To black clouds I go

Berlin appears a bit austere
A bit austere
But then you appear

I saw the scars of wars
The scars of wars
The scars…

Saw man’s evil laid on the ground
Laid on the ground
Dark memories all around

And God’s inspired beauty nearby
God’s beauty nearby
Candle smoke rose high

I saw the scars of wars
The scars of wars
The scars…

Alexanderplatz in the snow
Berlin Cathedral on show
Grey sky, Blue stars appear

Near Frankfurter Tor
Something began to stir
We drank beers and examined our years

I lost myself…I lost myself

We give so much
Now what’s left of us?
As we fit in and survive we said

Later we stared at that dome
And talked of our homes
And how our past pulls and things fade

I lost myself…I lost myself

I lit two candles for Lana,
There, in snowy Berlin,
My prayers mingled with the smoke,
That rose in the quiet space therein.

I get impatient,
Trying to connect true,
When games get in the way,
Of what is beautiful in you.
I wanted you to be real,
I don’t like false layers,
But I know I asked too much,
So my patience was my prayer.

Lana, I think you’re unhappy
You know how to survive,
How to protect yourself,
And to economically thrive.
But love is much misunderstood,
Have you ever known real love?
One that nurtures and grows,
Signified by that dove?
You were an intelligent, sensitive child,
Lost in a big boisterous family,
In a rough, striving environment,
Who listened to you intently?
Did you grow too hard a shell?
To protect yourself in there?
I wonder at your loneliness
So your happiness was my prayer.

There was snow on the ground
Blue sky and sun all around
Was that the reason that my blood was so thin?
I drank from the cup
Before I tried to get up
Why did I feel so exhausted there in Berlin?

They smoked outside in the snow
Then into cool music they go
They could hide ‘cos the light was so dim
They kissed and caressed
They moaned and they pressed
There was a decadence there in Berlin

Now they gave, it seemed a lot
Fruit’s always juicy before the rot
I finished the song, Ruthless, to sing
The buildings were all big and clear
It was all a bit functional and austere
I’d a lot of mixed feelings, there,  in Berlin

Beneath the cathedral dome
In high renaissance, like Rome
The organ could let God hear us sing
Outside in the snow
Past blue stars I go
I found some peace and some beauty in Berlin

I dreamt of Lana del Rey
How I became her prey
Her vulnerability, hid her desire to win
But though I know about love
As signified by that dove
I shivered with the cold there in Berlin

I lit two candles to show
That love can grow
And that closed games are really such a sin
I offered up two prayers
A symbol of how much I care
Such warmth was needed in Berlin