Thus I Wrote

I was falling in an empty forest
I was one hand clapping
You came needing to my door
And I awoke to your gentle tapping

Hold someone’s hand and make someone smile
Forget where you are going, if only for a while
Find your purpose, And nurture your gifts
To find your place to serve and exist

Know that your failures are the salt of life
They exist between try and achieve
They shine and polish your gifts
And your direction to believe

Inspired by Victoria Koenig’s poem Fog…northernthoughts

The fruits of our dating
In that room of waiting
In that room of life and death
The bed was bloody red
Where she had bloody bled
And this was where we first met

Fighting contractions
And wired inaction
She fought till tired and worn
In that lonely room
In our own cocoon
From bleeding flesh they were torn

In the silent peace
Of the aftermath release
She was too exhausted to respond
My child explored
While I adored
And we formed an unbreakable bond

I tried to be strong
As I went along
But was guilty of many thoughtless sins
I hope my love is the base
That gives them the grace
To be happy in their own skins

Economically they strive
As people they thrive
And I’m proud of their success
They’re my lifelong joy
And the love they employ
Is a constant in my happiness

Now then moody puss,
Have I’ve done something wrong?
I see you’ve got that frown again,
I see  you’ve got your face on.
I feel your silent disapproval,
I feel the tension of a trigger,
Behind angry words all ready,
To shoot me down with vigour.

We used to laugh and joke around,
And lighten up our day.
Maybe with a glass of wine,
And romantic interplay,
It’s hard to remember cuddles now,
On a day like today,
When you’re all argumentative,
No matter what I say.

Yeah, well I’m sorry,  I really am,
But work needed me late.
I’m no good at these arguments,
And you always win these debates,
That happen often and it hurts,
When you say that I don’t care.
Well, of course I do, I really do,
But… this is getting us nowhere.

I made her feel special
For a moment that night
But she’s “in a relationship”
Now I wonder what might

Could I bottle that feeling
And use it later on?
When silences are growing
And that magic has just gone?

We’re in a noisy world
Full of insecurity and tension
Could I create a special bubble?
And maintain her special attention?

We’re in a noisy world
Full of allure and distraction
For better or worse
Would I follow through with action?

But life is built on moments
One good memory at a time
And I’d create special memories
So she feels special and mine

I met a beautiful woman
Unexpected that night
And the universe clicked
Because something felt right

We had only a moment
But I felt something stir
I offered myself tentatively
I offered myself to her

Oh..Sometimes we reach out
And touch another’s soul
In ways that go deeper
Than ever we know

She was a gift
Offering hope it seems
A light in the distance
A glimpse of a dream

I made her feel special
For a moment in time
She opened my heart again
…..I think I’ll be fine

The world’s now betrayed me,
That hope-myth collage
My dreams have escaped me
Like a shimmering mirage.

Now what should I do
When all my world’s false?
When I’ve lost all my ideals
And all that I was taught

I find the purest line
That I can follow true
And I create bright new principles
New dreams and new values

I look for authenticity
And I take emotional risks
I build my own true code
And I create my own true mix

I now reject your past
It’s not effective any more
I now reject your rules
For my own path to explore

I find my own private self
Beyond your old moralities
Beyond your values and beliefs
Built on authentic practicalities

* Inspired by Ernest Hemingway’s – “The Sun Also Rises”.

Ah…the universe doesn’t know
The truth of what’s beauty
The truth of what’s right.
It doesn’t know the future
It awaits our answer
As we compete and fight.

The answer we build together
From competition
From risks and duress.
And of the many who strive
Some will fail
Some will sow progress.

Our birth and death
Show we are links
In a millennial chain.
That we are but stardust…
We’re from the stars
And shall return again.

The stadium was decked out
In red, white and blue
After palpable tension
The Marseillaise rang true
Respect was shown
And all honoured the fallen
They played tentatively first
Unprocessed shock callin’

But then a game broke out
As competition drove play
And the beautiful game
Became a healing ballet
And in union fans sang
And their flags they waved
A commonplace reminder
Of what’s to be saved

An immaculate ceremony
Of solidarity and communion
A mass catharsis
With defiance in union
It was important to say
We stand united against horror
That has no religion…
And has no colour.

Thoughts after England-France Game Wembley London 17-11-2015

Sometimes I take refuge
In childhood fairytales
Where right hero defeats wrong villain
And pure heart rips through malevolent veils
It stills my beating heart and
Soothes my aching searching soul
It is a little Light to give some hope
When a complex Universe takes its toll

But you say you speak for God
…Do not lie to me
If God exists he wants big answers
And not your ugly atrocity
History is filled with liars
Who say what God would say
Before they lead people blindly
Into some barbaric play

The universe asked a question
“What is the best way to exist?”
Many civilisations have answered
“This way is best we insist”
Many Messiahs stood alone
And answered with their vision
A step for the next Messiah to see more
And to offer the next revision

No one knows the future
Only death is certain
The Universe was created
Does God know the intention?
Man created fairytales
As a Light to help us for Good
But in Paris they spread darkness
In a way no loving God would

Later I will rationalise
Today I will mourn
Later I will dance
Today I will be forlorn
Later I will forgive
Today I will rage
Later I will be grown up
Today I will be a child’s age
Later I will laugh again
Today I will cry
Later I will understand
Today I will ask why