Thus I Wrote

I was alone
She had three
We came to battle
To divide and be free
I was well prepared
I knew all the law
My case was just
But with a hidden flaw

I looked from this end
To our loving start
Then a tide washed over me
And I fell apart

He took it all down
Brick by brick
Stone by stone
And stick by stick
He laid it all out
Who gave what to whom
I gave a better split
In that functional room

Because I looked from this end
To our loving start
Then a tide washed over me
And I fell apart

It died on the vine
Our joined family
Blown away by the force
Of factional uncertainty
When I held my line
And I didn’t concede
She withdrew from me
To punish my deed

I looked from this end
To our loving start
Then a tide washed over me
And I fell apart

There is a pain
Worse than a knife
It uses my head
It runs my life
It is a desert
A loneliness deep
I long for a quest
And a dreamless sleep

I looked from this end
To our loving start
Then a tide washed over me
And I fell apart

I had a choice when I raised my voice
I forgot I loved you
I was in my head, Too aloof you said
I forgot I loved you

You couldn’t predict, the actions I picked
You thought I didn’t love you
We disagreed, we wouldn’t concede
You thought I didn’t love you

In the mirror I see, a change in me
Dorian Gray
In the dark I chase, the love I misplaced
Dorian Gray

I was not true, I was hidden from view
I forgot I loved you
I kept my options open, but your trust was broken
I forgot I loved you

You thought the worst, that you didn’t come first
You thought I didn’t love you
You read the signs, I didn’t know were mine
You thought I didn’t love you

In the mirror I see, a change in me
Dorian Gray
In the dark I chase, the love I misplaced
Dorian Gray

I didn’t smile, for too long a while
I forgot I loved you
I didn’t tell you all, so you built a wall’
I forgot I loved you

You cry and begin, to count all my sins
You thought I didn’t love you
You cast the last stone, you want me to atone
You thought I didn’t love you

You crossed the line, you took what was mine
I thought you didn’t love me
Your words cut deep, you said its what I reap
I thought you didn’t love me

In the mirror I see, a change in me
Dorian Gray
In the dark I chase, the love I misplaced
Dorian Gray

You were my first love
I didn’t know it then
I was a bundle of energy
And uncertainty when,
I kissed your face
And I wanted too much
Distracted by others
That I needed to touch.

You’re in my thoughts
I always compare
I always wonder
If I had you there
But I was uncertain
I had too much fear
That left me blind
And let no one near.

You married a man
Who gave up his life
To adore and cherish you
His life, was his wife
I could not give so
Too selfish, I guess
My tunnel vision
In your eyes made me less.

I’m a bit of a loner
Only giving so much
I don’t want to be alone
But accept it as such.
I love in my way
But am drawn to understand
The futility of why?
These cards in my hand?

I find few truths
But love is one, clear
That which we give
And those we hold dear
I’ve studied my fears
Helped by wise men
And now is there time?
For me to love again?

I saw my father
In the mirror today
I said yesterday
What he might say
And I wore a black hat
To hide my grey hair
As I run too fast
From a life not fair

It is what it is
But what does it mean?
I’m an ignorant part
Of a greater machine
I can see the end coming
I’ll try not to stare
As I run too fast
From a life not fair

We’re in this together
So I’m not unique
It’s not an advantage
Or a favour I seek
We’re all alone
When our lives laid bare
We run too fast
From a life not fair.

I held someone’s hand
And made somebody smile
I forgot where I was going
At least for a while
Its good to be needed
And have someone to care
As we run too fast
From a life not fair.

You are my boundary
You are my quest
You are my reason
To be my best
I compete with you
And cooperate too
But I know I’m nothing…
Nothing without you

You are the air
That I breathe in
You are the water
Caressing my skin
I know that loving you
Is all I find true
But I know I’m nothing…
Nothing without you

You are the fire
That keeps me warm
You are the earth
My protection from harm
I know your leaving me
Will be so hard to do
I know I am nothing…
Nothing without you